Redemption
by Rosa D'inverno
Summary: Having chosen to forsake love for his dreams, can Tezuka ever find redemption?


Disclaimer: Still, nothing of Prince of Tennis belongs to me.

A/N: This plot came to my mind while I was shopping for groceries in the supermarket. Don't ask me why, because I honestly do not know!haha;)

Somehow, I like this story a lot, and it is probably a cliched plot, but I felt something when I was writing it, so yes.

Reviews are loved, so do tell me what you think of this short story!:) And yes, do pardon my mistakes!

* * *

"Kunimitsu, if one day you have to choose between tennis and love, which will you choose?"

She asked him that question four years back.

He didn't have a chance to reply then, for she answered for him.

"You'll choose to pursue tennis, won't you?"

She said that only because she understood him, and for her, she knew clearly that Tezuka wouldn't be Tezuka without his tennis. She understood, and yet, understanding something doesn't take away the pain of knowing the truth. Rather, precisely because you are expected to understand, you end up having no other choice but to accept the truth.

When the time came for her to do so, she gave him up, just as she knew she would.

--

When they first entered into a relationship, her friends constantly reminded her that she may not be the first priority in his life, and that his greatest love may not be her. She was conscious of it, and yet she fell in love with him anyway.

"You don't get to choose whom you fall in love with."

She remembered someone said that to her before, and on the surface, it seems to be true for her. But she is aware that this was not the case for her, for she chose to make the decision to be with him; she chose to love him even though she knew right from the start that someday, he will end up breaking her heart.

She anticipated the pain, and yet, it didn't lessen the hurt at all.

--

They had made an agreement. He told her not to wait for him, for he didn't have the confidence to promise her that he'll return. He didn't know how long it would take for him to accomplish his dreams. And yet, she said she will wait.

He told her, "Two years. Wait for me for two years, and if I'm still not back by then…move on."

Strangers who didn't know him will probably think of him as being callous and insensitive. But Rie knew otherwise. She recognized the underlying pain in his words, and she understood that he said what he did so as to make it easier for her.

--

In the end, she waited. Two years, and he still didn't come back. Her friends and family told her to let him go, and to move on. Stubbornly, she refused to. She clung on furiously to the times they spent together; to the memories they shared. She believed their love would see them through, and she held on to the faith that he wouldn't forget her.

A phone call from him shattered all that she longed for.

"Rie, let me go."

She remembered the words he said to her before he left, "Do not hold on to me, I cannot promise you anything."

She didn't long for his promises; all she wanted was to stay by his side. But as she watched him soar higher and higher, she realized that she could no longer hold on to him. Championships after championships, a year after a year, slowly, his image began to fade in her eyes, and all she was clinging on to were just threads of the person she fell in love with.

--

At the end of three years, she finally let him go.

And as the tears streaked her face, the lyrics of a song long forgotten kept re-playing in her mind.

_What hurts the most_

_Was being so close_

_And having so much to say_

_And watching you walk away_

_And never knowing _

_What could have been_

_And not seeing that loving you_

_Is what I was trying to do_

* * *

It has been four years since the last time he saw her.

And now, after so long, he is back. Back home, and back to where he belongs.

The moment the plane touched down at the airport, all he could think of was seeing her again.

But with every step, as he got closer to the place he knows he will find her at, the burden in his heart increases. He had already heard the news. He knows he wouldn't find her alone. He understands that things cannot possibly return to what they were years back. And yet, he still longs to see her, even for a while.

--

At the end of four years away from her, he finally sees her again.

He sees her standing a street away from him, standing at the side of a coffee table, arranging some flowers in a vase. Apparently, she owns the café. Just as he prepares himself to walk over to her, another person joins her.

He recognizes the bittersweet feeling in him as he sees how she smiles back at the other person, and at how contented she looked while in the arms of the other person.

'As long as she is happy. That is all that matters.'

Taking one last look at the happy couple across the street, he turns around and walks away from what could have been.

* * *

A strange feeling causes her to look up and take a glance across the street.

For a while, she wonders if he has finally returned after so long. Once upon a time, she would have been able to recognize his back view among so many others in large crowd. But now, she isn't too sure.

Someone just turned up the volume of the music player in the café. And as the music played on, the words reflected what was in her heart.

_I tried, but I had to draw the line_

_And still this question keeps on spinning in my mind_

'_What if I had never let you go?_

_Would you be the man I used to know?'_

_If I'd stayed, if you'd tried_

_If we could only turn back time_

_But I guess we'll never know_

At times, Rie would question if Tezuka ever thinks of what could have happened, and whether he ever regretted not telling her to stay by his side.

But now, as she stands safe and loved in the arms of another, she realizes that none of that matters anymore. It was over between them before it even started. Their love was real, but his dreams were more important. She still loves him, and she knows he still has her in his heart, but somehow, they both registered that it was not meant to be.

--

As the autumn leaves fell to the ground slowly around him, he allows himself one last thought.

"I have achieved my dreams, I have brought back glory to my home country. But I have failed to bring happiness to the one I love."

He draws his coat closer around him, and as he recalls what he witnessed a while ago, he takes comfort in what he remembers seeing. "Keep her happy, keep her healthy. Rie's yours now, Fuji. Do for her what I never could do."

Perhaps Fuji never had to make the decision he had to make a few years back. Or perhaps, Fuji did have to choose, and if he had to choose, Tezuka is glad his ex tennis teammate chose a different path from him.

One last question lingers in his mind. Fuji asked him this question a year back. He had called to tell him about Rie. And Fuji asked him, "Tezuka, if you have the chance to go back into time, and to choose again, will you change your decision?"

As the harsh wind blows sharply onto his face, Tezuka comprehends what pains him the most is not that he made the wrong decision. What pains him the most is he knows clearly that even if he is given a chance to re-do everything again, he would still make the same choice. He has to.

There are no "what ifs", because for Tezuka Kunimitsu, there is no going back. Life has to go on.

* * *

The songs used in the story are, "What hurts the most" by Rascal Flatts, and "What If" by Kate Winslet. I personally adore the song by Kate Winslet, as i think she is not just a wonderful actress, her voice is beautiful also:) so go youtube the song!

and I hope you enjoyed reading the story as much as I enjoyed writing it!=) take care!


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